Animal jokes
How does a donkey open a door?
With a don-key.
What do you call a woodpecker without a beak?
A headbanger.
*JMC*
ANOMALY-931
"Gwen"
Identification: just a stupid animal, with a big ass heart.
Why do animals in polar regions have thick fur? Because they don't have a barber! 🤣 🤣 🤣
What does a pig call its dad... mom? 😂
Women be like if men are gone, Earth would be a better place, (forgetting) women help to create war, weapons, animal and human cruelty, and have helped to enforce laws that oppress them.
Why did Mary have a little lamb? Because a big one was too much in bed.
What do you call a giraffe giving a blow job to another giraffe?
Getting neck!
I told my kids to smile with the monkeys in the open zoo.
They never got together at all.
Someone asked me what the lines on my wrist were from. I answered, "My cat has OCD."
What is the difference between a frog and a trombone player?
The frog might be on his way to a gig!
What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef.
What do you call a dog with no legs? No point in calling, he won't come anyway :(
The tortoise was swimming through the lake. His head got stuck in plastic. He said, "Oh dam."
Why was the Cheetah not allowed to do tests?
Because it always cheated.
How did Jenson lose against a Cheetah?
Because he was a cheetah!
Why did the cheetah go to school?
To be a cheetah.
I fed a vegan cock. No, not chicken, no, not my cock, my dead dad's.
I can never get away from my dog, he follows me everywhere. I think you two would be really good friends.
You're like a cat, all you do is eat and sleep.
How do you kill a sheep?
You lamb shank it!