Animal jokes
Why did the cat meow?
Because it's a cat, and they meow.
A farmer walks up to his farmer neighbor with a jug of milk. The farmer says, "I milked your cow." The neighbor replies, "I have a bull, not a cow."
How do you turn a duck into a soul singer?
Put him in the microwave until his bill Withers.
What do you call J Cow's new hit? Deja Moo!
What did the porg say to the porg?
Hi Porg.
You're on worst jokes ever. You thought I put up a good joke? HAHAHAH!
What animal has five legs? A pitbull returning from a playground.
What do you get when you cross a bunny and a Rottweiler? Just the Rottweiler.
You're the bunny, and I'm the Rottweiler.
So, Satan is in the delivery room having a child.
Soon, a feathered creature comes out. "Doctor," says Satan, "What is it?"
The doctor sighs. "Well, it's not a boy, and it's not a girl."
Satan looks frustrated. "THEN WHAT IS IT?!?!?"
The doctor looks up. "It's a goose."
What did the cow tell an Indian?
Moo!
What did the Indian say to the cow?
I lowe you, moo than anything.
Cats are like onions; when I cut them, I cry.
A dung beetle walks into a bar and says to another beetle, "Is this stool taken?"
Black dog is gay.
How do cows laugh?
Moo-haha.
What do you call a cow grazing a field with 50% grass and 50% weed? High steaks gambling.
If a cat hits you with her tail, is it considered being pussy whipped?
What do you call a pie made by an octopus? Octopie.
A horse says to the other horse, "Are you hot?"
The other horse says, "Ahhhh, a house that talks!"
What has 4 legs and 1 arm?
A pitbull in a children's play area.
What did the Canadian say when a guy shot his beaver?
"It is ok, I forgive you."