I just watched a program about beavers. It was the worst dam program I've ever seen.
Animal Jokes
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Owl say.
Owl say who?
Yes, they do.
It turns out a major new study recently found that humans eat more bananas than monkeys.
It’s true. I can’t remember the last time I ate a monkey.
Why did the pony have to gargle? Maybe because he was feeling a little hoarse.
What do you call a lesbian dinosaur?
Lickalotopuss
There are 30 cows in a field, 28 chickens. How many didn't?
A - 10
I've always wanted to WAVE to a dolphin, but it could never SEA me.
That dolphin is so WASHED up. WATER you say we get revenge?
What do you call a 100-year-old frog?
An old croak!
Why didn't the rooster cross the road?
Because he was a chicken!
Which came first, the chicken or the egg?
Eggs don’t cum.
My dog got mad at me for touching his toy. He said, "Get your paws off my toy!"
"Simba is proof cats don’t always land on their feet."
How do you scare a bee?
Boo-bee!
Why did the turtle cross the road?
We don't know yet.
OOF dislike plz I have no life XD.
All of these jokes are DED sub to pewdipie.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Who.
Who who?
Who who, I'm an owl.
What do cigarettes and hamsters have in common?
They can both be dangerous when you stick them in your mouth and light them on fire.
A horse walks into a bar.
The barman says...
"Why the long face?"
Three scientists are doing an experiment. They are trying to find out what happens when you stick a cork in an elephant's ass.
In the lab, they each look at each other and decide that they should hire a monkey to do it. The monkey sticks the cork up the elephant's ass, and the scientists wait three weeks.
The monkey pulls out the cork, and all three scientists go back and discuss what they saw.
The first one, standing one mile away, says all he could see was a wave of brown, then it all went black. The second, standing two miles away, said the same. The third, who was standing three miles away, said all he could see was the other two get consumed by a massive cloud of brown.
Me: Why did the chicken cross the road?
Person: Why?
Me: Because he wanted to.
What did the whale say?
Nothing!
It just wailed.
