Animal jokes
Why did the bat cross the road? Because to get to the blood bar.
What did scientists prove when they saw a skeleton on the moon?
The cow didn’t make it.
How does a cow do math?
With a cow-culator!
I was going to tell you a joke about a big cat, but I would be lion.
...... fuck the turtles...... THE END
My friend has a dog who looks like cocoa. Her name is Cocoa!
If there are 12 fish and 6 drown, how many are left?
12, because fish don't drown.
Why did ze cow cross the road?
yo watch his mum getting butchered she was an udder failure.
What is a pig’s 🐷 favorite pie 🥧?
Mississippi Mud.
What do you call a cow with all of his legs? High steaks.
They didn't have a category for Bald, so I chose the Bald Eagle.
Did you know that bald people have an endless forehead?
What is a chicken's favorite day of the week? Fri-day.
What do you call a pig?
Pig.
A guy walks up to me in the street and asks if you have to include the name of an animal in every sentence. I said only if it's relephant.
He says what about vegetables. I said not nesecelery.
Where do Eagles send their children to study?
The Alpha birds.
What is the difference between babies and dogs?
I don't eat dog parts.
My dog used to chase people on a bike a lot. It got so bad, finally I had to take his bike away.
How are a mouse and a bale of hay alike?
The cat'll eat it (the cattle eat it).
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Who.
Who who?
You sound like an owl.
What's a cow's favorite war?
World War Moo.