Always jokes
How is an orphan like a boomerang?
They always come back!
Why are hospitals always freezing?
They need to keep the vegetables cold.
Teacher: Okay class, look at the person to the right of you and describe them with one word.
Me: *looks to the right of me and sees the pick-me girl* "Penny."
Teacher: *shocked* How is she a penny?
Me: 'Cause she's two-faced, flat, and always in someone's pants. Not to mention worth practically nothing.
I am always high, welcome to bipolar disorder. LMAO. (Don't bother to like or comment, I just had to say this.)
Who is always looking spot on?
The cheetahs.
Why does this always happen to me...
Why can't Heaven and Hell ever be one 2nd paradise?
Heaven always has 5-star reviews.
Why was Stephen Hawking always like this 🫠?
Because he didn’t have emojis on his computer.
Bro, I’m so pissed. There is always that one kid in the class who the teacher helps. I hate that guy in the wheelchair.
My family is lucky I was born so smart. Every time my Dad is struggling at work, he always turns to me when he needs to get ahead.
Why do orphans always get an iPhone X?
Because it doesn’t have a home button.
My girlfriend calling me: I'm home alone ;)
Me: I know, you always are...
Why do orphans hate p*rn hub?
They always see a stepdad and stepsis.
What kind of veggie is always getting itself into a hard situation?
A pickle.
Why do basketball players hate gravity?
Because it's always bringing them down.
What did the teacher say to the fat Turkish kid that always ate in his class?
"You could do with Ramadan lasting all year, couldn't you?"
Why don’t rappers ever get lost?
They always have a SICK FLOW to follow.
Why do Indian guys never have gfs? Because they always pick curry and biryani over girls.
What's the last thing Asians hear from their parents?
"My money is my money. Your money is my money. Your wife's money is my money. Always remember that, son."
I'm not saying I'm ugly...
But when I'm watching porn, the hot, sexy women in my area always pop up and ask me if I'm rich.
House parties are like churches: there's always an underage kid getting fucked somewhere.