Always jokes
My girlfriend calling me: I'm home alone ;)
Me: I know, you always are...
Why do orphans always get an iPhone X?
Because it doesn’t have a home button.
Why do melons always have big weddings?
Because they cantaloupe!
What kind of veggie is always getting itself into a hard situation?
A pickle.
Why do orphans hate p*rn hub?
They always see a stepdad and stepsis.
Memes
Hollow Knight Meme
Why don’t rappers ever get lost?
They always have a SICK FLOW to follow.
Why don’t rappers play hide and seek?
Because good luck finding someone who’s always in the booth!
House parties are like churches: there's always an underage kid getting fucked somewhere.
What's the last thing Asians hear from their parents?
"My money is my money. Your money is my money. Your wife's money is my money. Always remember that, son."
Why do Indian guys never have gfs? Because they always pick curry and biryani over girls.
Both man and woman have balls, but they like to play with the ball of each other because a person always loves what they don't have. 😁
I was always told as a kid that I have to pick between being a programmer and an English teacher.
They said: you can't be a "pro-grammer nazi."
Why do basketball players hate gravity?
Because it's always bringing them down.
Why should you always wear rubber?
So you don’t leave DNA evidence.
Why was Stephen Hawking always like this 🫠?
Because he didn’t have emojis on his computer.
I'm not saying I'm ugly...
But when I'm watching porn, the hot, sexy women in my area always pop up and ask me if I'm rich.
People always often say to someone who are thinking about suicide that's the easy way out. Don't give up! All I say is I'm not giving up, just I'm giving in, and does it really seem like it's the easiest way out? I don't think so, it's probably the hardest if you ask me, or I would have done it already, but someone's got to do it.
I was always told I’m too small to ride, but every girl I’ve been with rated me a 9.5.
Guy 1: P-gay or T-gay?
Guy 2: P-gay sounds cooler.
Guy 1: Yeah me too. I don't like P-ewDiePie, always love T-series.
Guy 2: Omg what did i just say? I wasn't even knowing what were you talking about :<
Guy 1: Like I do care :$
Guy 3: But I do care :<
Guy 1: F*ck you.
Guy 3: Do it.
Guy 2: But you do care about me.
Guy 3: No.
Guy 2: F*ck you.
Guy 3: Do it.
:D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D
What is the difference between a retard and a zombie anyway?
They’re always hungry and shuffle around aimlessly, moaning... Oh, and it takes a bullet in the forehead to put them both down.
Uh!!!