Agriculture jokes
What did the policeman shout to the cow running away?
"Get to the ground, beef!"
What happens when a cow farm gets destroyed, then built up again?
It'll be udder renovation!
What do you call it when a cow gets disciplined by her parents?
Grounded beef.
Sneed feed seed.
Formerly Chuck's!
Where do all orphan chickens end up? Foster Farms.
Abe vs The South
Why did the chicken cross the road to get to the chicken coop?
What do orphans and apples not have in common? Apples get picked.
A cow in an earthquake is called a milkshake.
What do you call a nervous zucchini?
An edgy veggie.
What do you call a cow with no legs?
Ground beef! (aka dinner)
How do you spot a cow?
With a bingo dabber.
What does the chicken say when he didn't understand something?
"What hap-HENd?"
What do you call a cow that no one likes? The mooser.
Why don't chickens and sheep get along?
Because they have beef between them.
Idiot 1: Why are cows good in math?
Idiot 2: I don't know why.
Idiot 1: Because they have built-in cowculators!
What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor?
"Where's my tractor!"
What is big and long and hard?
A cucumber!
An astronaut has had a mid-life crisis. He decides to leave everything behind and become a country farmer.
He buys some land and equips himself with everything he needs. The following Monday, he's ready to go with his hoe in hand and is about to walk out the gate, but he can't get through.
Why, you might ask? He's got no arms.
Cow: *can't be milked for 20 years*
9/11:
Rabbit poop is cereal.