Agriculture jokes
Why didn't the cows eat the lemon grass?
It made sour milk.
Why did the ox get kicked out of the herd?
Because it wasn't being an ox, it was being a butt-ox...!
What is the difference between orphans and apples?
Apples get picked.
What’s a cow with no body and no nose?
Nobody knows.
Why did ze cow cross the road?
yo watch his mum getting butchered she was an udder failure.
What happens when a cow masturbates?
Beef jerky.
What do retarded cops give tickets for?
Going over 45 in a potato zone.
What is big and long and hard?
A cucumber!
What do you call a nervous zucchini?
An edgy veggie.
What do cows call money?
Moola.
Teacher: What does a pig give you?
Little Johnny: Bacon.
Teacher: Good, what does the sheep give you?
Little Johnny: Wool.
Teacher: What does the fat cow give you?
Little Johnny: Homework and says, "Leave, motherfucker."
How do you keep a bull from charging?
You take its credit card away.
What goes moo? Cow.
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What do you call a united cow? A united steaks! 🤣🤣🤣
Did you hear about the tomato and the lettuce race?
Well, the lettuce was ahead, and the tomato was trying to ketchup!
What did the farmer say when he saw his chicken cross the road?
"No, my cock!"
What do you call a bull sleeping?
A bull-dozer.
Ever had a migraine? Yeah, sorry that’s my fault. Couple years ago, all my grains got loose.
How do cows get their milk? The moo market.
What’s the difference between 9/11 and a dead cow?
You can’t milk a dead cow for 20 years.