Agriculture jokes
What do you call a cow with 2 legs?
Lean meat.
Q: What do you get from a two-legged cow? A: Lean beef.
What do you call a male cow that snores?
A “Bull Dozer”.
What do you call a cow that doesn't give milk?
A milk dud!
Why couldn't the cowboy go to the rodeo?
He forgot his calves!
How can you find out how old a cabbage is?
By looking at its cabbAGE.
Why did the cow cross the road?
To get to the Moo-vie theater.
A farmer told me that he wanted a couple of acres, so I punched him in the teeth.
Why do orphans like cows?
Because when they leave, they bring back the milk.
What do apple trees and orphans have in common?
The apples get picked.
What is the difference between 9/11 and a cow?
You stop milking a cow after 15 years.
My sister has cows, and after 4 months, she said there was a mis-steak.
What do retarded cops give tickets for?
Going over 45 in a potato zone.
What’s the hardest part of a vegetable? The wheelchair.
Did you hear about the boy who sat under a cow?
He got a pat on the head.
How do you stop a bull from charging? Cancel its credit card.
What happened when a cow jumps over a barbed wire fence? Complete and utter destruction.
What did one bean say to the other bean?
How you bean?
What did the grape say when he got squished? Nothing, he just let out a little wine.
What type of apple grows on a tree?
All of them.