Agriculture jokes
What is a cow's favorite water sport?
Ca-MOO-ing!
Bean.
What do you call a masturbating cow?
Beef stroganoff.
One cow asks another cow, "Are you afraid of mad cow disease?"
The other cow says, "Why should I be? I'm a helicopter."
What did the bus driver say to the nut 🥜?
"Where do you live?"
What do you call a pig in a farm?
- A pig in a farm.
What do you call a cow that doesn't produce any milk? An udder failure.
What did the cow say every morning?
Good moorning!
Teacher: What is a cow?
Kid: Meat.
Teacher: Nice. What is a chicken?
Kid: Eggs.
Teacher: What does the big fat pig give you?
Kid: Homework.
What did a fat cow give you?
Homework.
What do you call a cow that doesn't stop shaking?
A milkshake.
Q: Why did the cow touch an electric fence?
A: Because it wanted to get electrocowted! 🐄
Why did the chicken cross the road? To poo in the toilet.
What was the incontinent farmer's greatest problem? He managed his carrot patch but couldn't control his peas!
One time, a cow saved my life.
It was bovine intervention.
A pair of cows were talking in the field. One says, “Have you heard about the mad cow disease that’s going around?”
“Yeah,” the other cow says. “Makes me glad I’m a penguin.”
What's the difference between 9/11 and a cow?
You can't milk a cow for over 10 years.
What did the female farmer say to the person who raises a male chicken? "Nice cock!"
Why did the cow say moo?
Because he had to go poo.
What do depressed teenagers and fruits have in common?
They both hang by something.