Age jokes

My teacher made us watch a movie about the struggles of being an overweight person in this day and age.

It was really heavy on me.

Yo mama so old, her photos are in a museum and her friends are in a graveyard.

I had sex with my German girlfriend; it was kinda weird though. She kept yelling her age. I don't know why.

If you got a bowling ball and you stuck it on top of a sack of potatoes, what would you get?

A "retiree."

Your hairline goes so far back your mom can't even reach it.

Your mama's so young your dad went to jail.

I will make a funny joke if you let me be your boyfriend. I'm 19 and I am Russian.

Bro, Asian girls have the weirdest names. I was fucking one and she kept on saying, "I'm Tu Yung."

I like my clocks like I like people.

Under 12.

Your hairline and my grandpa go wayyyyy back.

My friend jokingly confessed to me she did prostitution (consensual).

She wasn't joking. :0

We are 15....

You look too old to be living with your grandma.

I was gobsmacked when I encountered the Jacko special at a Bunnings sausage sizzle. A 40-year-old sausage on 7-year-old white bread.

Your mama is so old, she made a book bigger than the Bible about her life.

Yo mama so old, she pre-ordered the Bible.

Yo mama so fat and old, she's the meteor that wiped out the dinosaurs!

Your hairline is so far back that it dated back to 13 BC.

Your mama is so old, her first Christmas, she was a Wiseman's +1.

What goes up but never comes down?

Doctors in the Middle Ages, Plague doctor: "I must have some herbs to block out bad air."

Doctors now: "God, WTF were we doing back then?"