A father asked his son, Little Johnny, if he knew about the birds and the bees. “I don’t want to know!” Little Johnny said, exploding and bursting into tears.
Confused, his father asked Little Johnny what was wrong. “Oh, Pop,” Johnny sobbed, “For me there was no Santa Claus at age six, no Easter Bunny at seven, and no Tooth Fairy at eight. And if you’re telling me now that grownups don’t really have sex, I’ve got nothing left to live for!”
I'm 24 and I was with a Chinese lady, and she kept screaming, "I'm too young!" Like, I don't know what that name is.
I have MP3s on my computer that are older than Johnny Depp's new significant other.
Why does Michael Jackson like 44-year-olds? There's 4 of them.
Girl, you must be a Muslim because you are only 5 years old, yet you know how to give great head.
When my grandpa was 65, he decided to run a mile a day to keep fit.
He's 70 now, and we have no idea where he is.
I like my girlfriend's new secondary school uniform, I guess, but doesn’t beat her old primary school one. 😀
Did you know that McDonald's made a Michael Jackson burger?
It’s a 50-year-old piece of meat in a 12-year-old bun.
Who is older than the Twin Towers?
Billy Bob the 1th. He was older than the Twin Towers. He was born 3 minutes before the Twin Towers and is still alive today.
What’s the difference between a microwave and a 10 year old girl? The microwave doesn’t fart out blood and diarrhoea when you pull your meat out
Yo mama so fat, when she was just there, she made the whole earth go back to the ice age!
The Good Old Days.
You don't appreciate a lot of stuff in school until you get older. Little things like being spanked every day by a middle-aged woman: Stuff you pay good money for in later life.
Your mom is so old that her birth certificate says "expired."
Can't have a smoke with my girl after sex, she's asthmatic.
Plus, she's too young to smoke.
Johnny Depp once said in an interview: "I get older, my girlfriends stay the same age."
Maybe Johnny Depp's soulmate isn't born yet. We'll see in 20-25 years.
What's Juice WRLD's favorite place to shop at?
Answer: Forever 21.
Everyone put your age here.
Yo hairline so far back, it oversaw the creation of the earth!
What do a 100-year-old pornstar and The White Stripes have in common? Icky Thump!
My mom left me at a very young age.
