Aed jokes
Q: What did the cannibal say to the leper?
A: You gonna eat that?
How do you name a disabled Asian?
Throw the wheelchair down the stairs.
Why are Japanese always so skinny?
Cause last time there was a fat man, an entire city disappeared.
I cried when my dad was chopping onions. Onions was a good dog.
A man walks into a bar with a 44. Magnum and yells, "Who the fuck fucked my wife?" The bartender answers, "Mate, you ain't got enough bullets."
I used to have a fear of hurdles.
But I got over it.
I drew a picture of a whale in the ocean. My brother asked, "What are you drawing?" I said, "You taking a shower."
what was sally's role in a football game?
the football ;-;
Helen Keller fell down a well. She screamed and screamed until she was blue in the hands.
My daughter said I could never make a car out of spaghetti. You should have seen the look on her face when I drove pasta!
How do you confuse a blonde? Put it in a circle and tell it to sit in the corner.
The doctor says, "Your wife is pregnant." The man says that he used a condom and the doctor says, "Yeah, but I didn't."
A recent study has found that beer contains female hormones.
A test group of 100 male volunteers each consumed six pints of beer, and the effect was they all talked endlessly about nothing and couldn’t drive for shit.
My life is a lot like a game of Black Jack.
I always hit on 16, then get busted.
A Mexican boy said, "I can't do this." Then a guy says, "You can do it, we are Mexican, not Mexicant."
What is the similarity between a sloth and a depressed kid?
They both hang from trees.
A boy and his friend were walking down the street.
Boy 1: "Bro, you still got my Nikes?"
Boy 2: "Yeah, sorry. I got them dirty."
Boy 1: "Please clean them, we have school tomorrow."
Boy 2 got back to his house and decided to clean his friend's shoes. After he finished drying them, he got stuck in his painfully small dryer. Then he remembered his brother needed something from the dryer. So he tried to get out, when his brother came in.
He came in twice.
(like if u understand)
Why was the guitarist arrested?
He fingered a minor.
Why did the cheetah get disqualified?
Because he was a cheetah, duh!
A heavily pregnant woman is in an accident and gives birth to twins while comatose. Upon awakening some days later, the doctors tell her that her brother Tom filled out the birth certificates while she was out.
"Oh no, Tom's an idiot, what did he name my daughter?" she asked the nurse.
"Denise."
"That's not a bad name. And what did he name the boy?"
"Tom Junior."