Aed jokes
Lil Johnny looked a lil bonny, but then when he saw Tommy, he decided to bomb me.
I’m working on a good pun, but it makes no one laugh.
Why?
I don’t have a clue.
How do you know your baby is dead?
It stopped screaming after not feeding the bastard for a month.
So, my best friend's boyfriend broke up with her, and she started to cry.
So I told her a "single" joke, then she said, "Go and fucking die, you insensitive bitch!"
I later said, "Ugh, fine, as your BFF, I will break his body for you—happy now?"
She said, "*sniff* yes."
What do you call a dabbing cow?
Udder savagery.
The FBI said, "Open up!" I shout to them.
A person said, "Cookie sale." I opened up. He fucked me.
What do you call a lesbian dinosaur?
Licka-lotta-puss.
When a lady gets married, what does she borrow?
She borrows her husband's last name.
What do you call someone who farts in public? A private tutor.
What is a nut that does magic?
A human that can turn into a nut!
I'm a clown.
What did the skeleton say to the other skeleton? "I've got a bone to pick with you!"
That was a real rib tickler. I've got a skele-TON more of the skele-PUNS!
Disabled people can help the world to get a printed copy of "Leaning Tower of Pisa," exactly leaned at an angle.
If my cat was a cactus, doesn't that make him a catus?
What does a cow sound like when in a horror house?
Moo mooo moooooooo (screaming)!
What do you call three people in a dark room? A porno.
What is the difference between a human and a tree?
A human can walk and a house can walk to a tree, walk home, walk, walk, and walk, walk.
A person walks into the bar and said, "Hey barman, get my son a drink and tell him his dad is dead."
Who said that?
I asked my sister to get me a cup of fruit punch. I realized she was taking a bit so I walk to the kitchen and noticed that she spilled it on herself. I asked her, "How did you do that?" but there was no response.
"Hey man, what's that, a dynamite you have in your hand? Ok, well hold it over. I'll give it right back."
"Oh no, I won't!"
"Oh yes, you will!"
"Oh, I won't!"
"Oh yes, you will!"
"Ok fine, then you take it or I'll blow our your butt before it farts."