Aed jokes

Apparently there was a woman from Australia who had sex with 500 men in one day.

That's like a real life "Your mom" joke.

If you're ever in need of a punching bag, just go to your local Alzheimer's unit.

They'll forget you were there in like three minutes.

I have a paso.

What is the difference between an emo kid and a jug of milk?

The milk doesn't hang itself after it gets dumped.

I was making a coffee for my boss and this was the supposed recipe:

1 egg 1 tomato diced bell peppers a bag of sugar sea salt coffee beans rusted nails.

I got fired and spent the next 20 years in prison with a dude named Papa Bear.

I can make a living with the "Treat Yo self" budget.

Yet I can’t use the "Help yo self" budget.

Yesterday, I was on a reality TV show where they locked me up with all those smelly monkeys from the Leger Zoo. It was complete madness.

One time, I was making a caramel apple.

When I mistook 1 gallon of caramel for 1 camel!

Ever wondered how Jesus got rid of the cross that killed him?

Burned it in a hellish fire to make some firewood.

I was watching The Conjuring with an emo person. She said she likes the part where the girl was hanging. I said, "Why? Because you wish it were you?"

When an African has a twin, your me??

Yo mama so fat that John Cena couldn’t get her down with an Attitude Adjustment!

Yo mama so fat when The Rock hit her with a Rock Bottom, her big fat ass belly let all the pizza explode out of her belly!

Why are orphans not that good at baseball?

They can never hit a homerun.

2023- my dad is a cop.

1800- my dad owns your dad.

What's the different when a little boy drops in Japan then and now?

When a little boy falls today he gets back up. But then everyone fell and never came back up.

What did the white baby say to his Chinese parents?

"Two wongs don’t make a white."

Q: Why did the Mexican start taking anti-anxiety pills?

A: Because he was taking them for His-panic attacks.

I went up to the deaf kid and said, "I’m going to punch you in 3, 2, 1." And he ended up with a broken nose, and I said, "You should have listened to me!"

My dad has a pretty shitty job.