Aed jokes
I was lying on the living room carpet the other day with my girlfriend on top of me in wings and a tutu, making out.
I called her the Fallen Angel.
Who wants a spot of bukkake for bedtime?
I was literally cradlesnatched as a child.
Yeah, in the arms of an older woman experiencing my first rounds of motorboating.
Your mom is the biggest tosser on the planet, yeah, you heard right.
I don't have to strain myself a blood vessel and be wankin' solo anymore; she saved me a whole load of arthritis.
Like a work film, to take new in the center.
More good, Tar de Spring is the mill Murray Hurlowar Skelett Dwight Dowl - for its general help!
It's a Italy day outside the fields.
She asked me if I was hung like a horse, but I said no.
I'm hung like a person who wants to die, but then the rope broke.
What kind of experience does a feminazi have for being a feminist?
Being a bitch.
Huggy's so fat, Playtime Co. had to make him a monument of fatness.
What happened to the chicken when he crossed the road? He didn't. He got run over by a truck.
I was going to charge my phone, so I pulled a plug and put it in. Then, my grandpa wasn't breathing anymore.
When someone asks you why you went bald, say it wasn't a choice. It just happened.
Last week, I made a joke about leftists. Now it is time for me to take shots at the right, and then I will move on to centrists. But I just said the same thing twice.
Why do orphans have a single chip? Because they don't have a full bag.
Your mum is so cool, she looks like a fridge. Quote: Jude Porters.
What is a woman's name with one leg?
Eileen.
There’s a noticeable difference between using polish to remove grease and using Polish to remove Greece.
Did anyone around here lose a roll of twenty-dollar bills wrapped with a rubber band? Because we found the rubber band.
Orthodox Christians are a little slow; they take 13 days to get the joke. So go easy on them, alright?
What do you call a singer who can't make a song?
Taylor Swift.