Aed jokes
Kurt Cobain's last job was a blow job. He blew his head clean off.
Q. What do you get when you cross a mentally disabled person with a pedophile? A. Jeffy Epstein.
What do you call a person with nobody and no nose?
I lost my virginity to a girl with Down syndrome. I told my mom I wanted my first time to be special.
When a midget smokes weed, does it get medium?
Did you know "bj" ends with "job" because if you are giving a man a blow job, it sucks? But if you’re giving it to a woman, it's called "eating out" because it’s a privilege.
My girlfriend went to the doctor for a broken arm, and they told her it should be better in about two months. I asked her what they said. She said, "It should be better in about two months." I then asked her, "What did the dentist say?"
I pulled my kid out of school after a woke teacher taught my six-year-old about pronouns! Yesterday, it was "he/she," today, "they/it," tomorrow, "I/you/we!"
When it's NNN but you have a peanut allergy: 🥳
What do you call a singer who can't make a song?
Taylor Swift.
Why don't you use a dull pencil?
Because there's no point. 😐😑😑
What do you call a downie superhero?
Chromo-doner.
Orthodox Christians are a little slow; they take 13 days to get the joke. So go easy on them, alright?
What's the difference between a shopping bag and Michael Jackson?
One is white, made of plastic, and dangerous for children. The other is for groceries.
There are some questionable candies out there, such as:
"All I want is a good Blow Pop."
"I don’t even want to know where that Butterfinger has been."
"If you do, you’ll probably end up with tasting the rainbow."
"Nobody wants to bite into an O’Henry."
"Or adopt Three Musketeers."
"Or even end up with a Sour Patch."
Why can Elsa hold a balloon? She will "Let It Go"!
When a woman says, "I need to be treated like a delicate flower," don't cut the wrong cord on the bomb.
How do you know that a woman is about to say something smart?
She starts the sentence with ‘a man once said.’
Did anyone around here lose a roll of twenty-dollar bills wrapped with a rubber band? Because we found the rubber band.
Why can’t Homer Simpson bring his family into Moe’s Tavern?
Because there’s a bartender in there.