Aed jokes
For some reason a group of emo kids are following me because I gave them a Happy Meal.
Yo mama so fat that when she went to the fatty competition, they said no because they didn't want professionals.
(Just a joke, she's probably kind.)
What's the difference between a newborn baby and an orphan after a rugby match?
They both come out bloody and crying, but at least one gets picked up.
My uncle died in 9/11. He was a pilot.
Your mum (mom) so fat, she wore a yellow T-shirt, they said "Taxi!"
Jack is a ugly meany who’s not going to my birthday!
I’m a paki nonse.
Dylan is so stinking when he goes for a poo poo! 😭🤣🤣
What does a sex offender that is a lesbian have in common with a sex offender that is a feminist?
They only performed cunnilingus on girls under 18 years old.
Why should a feminist never join the United Auto Workers, UAW?
Because the only thing that a feminist would do in the United Auto Workers, UAW is lick pussy all day in the woman's restroom.
Why did the T-Rex not clap when you won a prize?
Because it's dead.
I was watching The Perfect Murder with my boyfriend. It was a good movie, but the weird thing was that my boyfriend was taking notes throughout the whole movie.
How do the Powerpuff Girls vape?
They take a "power puff."
Panchatantra is a collection of Indian fables.
Why are orphans bad at poker?
They don’t know what a full house is.
POV: A person made you mad, but you're Chinese and they have a cat. "CHING CHONG, CHING CHONG, CHING CHONG, BITCH."
I snorted a line of coke off my 8-year-old sister’s tiny prepubescent vag. She just laid there and let me do it without complaining, probably because she was already dead.
Yo mama so hairy that the zookeepers called a code red thinking an ape got loose.
Me explaining my child: when your mom is sitting on a table during her period, it's called the periodic table.
A police officer came up to me and said, "Just why, why would you bring the epileptic children to a laser tag fight?"