Actor jokes

Why did Paul Walker cross the street?

Because he wasn't wearing his seatbelt.

Chuck Norris can make Minute Maid lemonade in 5 seconds.

What do Paul Walker and I have in common? Neither of us have seen Fast and the Furious 7.

Why are there no good Indian actors? Because all the good ones are trying to get your bank details over the phone.

Johnny Depp once said in an interview: "I get older, my girlfriends stay the same age."

Maybe Johnny Depp's soulmate isn't born yet. We'll see in 20-25 years.

Why are Indians such good actors?

Most of them are phone scammers.

What do you call a porn star that always goes back for more?

Craven Morehead.

"I always like walking in the rain, so no one can see me crying."

- Charlie Chaplin

Q) What do you call Iron Man when he can't swim?

A) Robert Drowney Jr.

What do you call Amber Heard crying during the lawsuit?

A DEPPression.

(If you are a fan of either Johnny Depp or Amber Heard, you might get the joke).

Paul Walker's death was a tragedy, but at least he went out in a blaze of glory.

Chuck Norris once ran all the way around the equator and kicked himself in the back.

I actually think Paul Walker was a good man, he did not deserve to be burned alive.

He had a change of race tho when he died.

My girlfriend's a porn star.

She'd kill me if she found out.

Jeff, did you hear they're making a film about Jimmy Savile? It’s a very touchy subject.

Yeah, I did, Gary, but did you hear the reviews on the Bill Cosby film? People said it was so boring it put them to sleep.

I got a part in a movie called "Cocaine." I only have one line.

Chuck Norris doesn't get sun burns. The sun knows better.

James Woods, starring in the newest movie: "September 11, two thousand fun."

So Paul Walker made a rap cover. It is called "Straight Out of Windshield."

How do you know Johnny Depp finished his meal?

When you see fifty empty bottles of wine on his front doorstep.