Chuck Norris threw a grenade once. It killed 300 people.
And then it exploded.
What does a male Asian P*rnstar like to say?
"I love eating cat."
What do orphans and olden day actors have in common?
Both get food thrown at them some of the time.
If Adolf starred in the Room, his most iconic line would be “I did not Hitler! I did not!”
What was Morgan Freeman called before the Civil War?
Morgan.
Joaquin Phoenix as The Joker is like Heath Ledger if he overdosed on prescription drugs... Oh, wait. He already did.
Danny Devito looks like one of those men with a short, yet thick penis.
Biggest joke?
[Image of Zac Efron]
Your hairline pushed too far back.
Lookin' like it got slapped up by Will Smith :D
Since Christopher Reeves can't play Superman, they got a new person: Christopher Walken.
What does Vin Diesel eat for dinner?
Survival Guilt.
What's the opposite of Christopher Reeve?
Christopher Walken.
How do you find Will Smith in the snow?
You look for the fresh prints.
Chuck Norris is...
What? You don't need to know what he is. He's just, Chuck.
How do you spell racecar backwards?
racecar
How do you spell racecar sideways?
Paul Walker's death.
What does Matthew McConaughey say at the Republican convention...
We're gonna take back what is ours, alt right, alt right, alt right, hee heeeee...
Your hairline goes so far back it looks like it got slapped back by Will Smith.
Dad: I heard an actor killed themselves with a knife. It was Reese something.
Mom: Witherspoon.
Dad: No, with a knife, you dummy!
If Bruce Willis (the guy in the Christmas movie Die Hard) dies of a Viagra overdose, would that mean he truly dies hard?
Chris Hemsworth is Australian, and Thor is from space. Does that make him an Australien?
