Actor jokes
I'm glad I'm not a pornstar... that would be pretty sucky.
What does Johnny Depp hate about driving a car?
He can't drink and drive.
I got a part in a movie called "Cocaine." I only have one line.
Why did the octopus cry?
Because his mum said he looked like Johnny Depp.
Q) What do you call Iron Man when he can't swim?
A) Robert Drowney Jr.
I actually think Paul Walker was a good man, he did not deserve to be burned alive.
He had a change of race tho when he died.
Jeff, did you hear they're making a film about Jimmy Savile? It’s a very touchy subject.
Yeah, I did, Gary, but did you hear the reviews on the Bill Cosby film? People said it was so boring it put them to sleep.
Why are Indians such good actors?
Most of them are phone scammers.
Michael J. Fox is rumored to be starring in the new Tremors sequel.
"I always like walking in the rain, so no one can see me crying."
- Charlie Chaplin
What is Johnny Depp's new legal name?
Johnny in debt.
Dwayne “the Rock” Johnson has made a laudable, command decision to omit real firearms from his movie sets.
This being the case, he ought to produce, direct, and star in his next movie titled: “The Rubber Gun Squad!” 👌 😉
Did you know Paul Walker had dandruff? Neither did I til I seen his Head and Shoulders on the dashboard.
Since Christopher Reeves can't play Superman, they got a new person: Christopher Walken.
What do you call a porn star that always goes back for more?
Craven Morehead.
How do you know Johnny Depp finished his meal?
When you see fifty empty bottles of wine on his front doorstep.
Why does Ezra Miller’s Flash run in a straight line in The Flash movie? Bro ain’t straight.
Michael J. Fox walks into the grocery store to buy some salt. When he comes out, a kid turns to his mother and says, "Look mom, a salt shaker!"
What do Paul Walker and I have in common? Neither of us have seen Fast and the Furious 7.
Chuck Norris: "Chuck Norris doesn't fight, he just allows you to lose."
Me: "How come did you lose Return of the Dragon?"