Accident jokes
Why did the Titanic sink?
Because the people aboard are stupid.
Where do you take someone who’s been injured in a peek-a-boo accident?
To the I.C.U.
When my friend fell, I didn't crack up, but the sidewalk did.
I left my boots on in the river, and I drowned.
One day, a class of children were killed in a bus accident, but only some survived. One was praying that he would survive, and the other said, "First time?"
I threw a kid in a wheelchair into a fire... I called him hot wheels.
Why did AlexDaEgg fall down the stairs? Because he is fat.
A book just fell on my head. I’ve got only my shelf to blame!
True story: my math teacher Mr. Ueberoth accidentally marked a Kahoot as 100 points in Google Classroom instead of 10. If he doesn't find out, the grades will be more hyperinflated than Zimbabwe's economy.
John Kreese's forehead broke when silver hit 'em in the forehead.
Why did the chicken cross the road?
To cut through traffic.
What do you call a gay kid on fire?
My grandma stubbed her toe in an elevator on September 21st.
There were two snakes slithering along when one snake said to the other snake, "Are we poisonous?" "Idk why?" The other snake responded, "'Cause I just bit my tongue!"
Random Kid: Aye man where was Kobe flying to?
Launch Site: Umm, he might have gone too close to here, sorry if he might have crashed...
Your forehead so big, I think that's what Kobe crashed into.
Who's Paul Walker's close friend?
Tree.
From now on, we’re gonna call shitting the bed an “Amber Alert.”
A: Why did Sally fall off the swing?
B: Why?
A: Because she has no arms.
Knock, knock.
B: Who's there?
A: Not Sally.
Joe was eating ice cream while walking on the street. He dropped his ice cream. Why?
B: I don't know, why?
A: Because Sally was driving the car.
You were born on a highway in a car crash, I wonder why.