Accident

Accident Jokes

when a kinderX=MsgBox("you do not have permission to delete this item",2+64,"error")the abcsgarten teacher askes a kid to sing alphabet he said ab3defg teacher said do you like 3d he said yeah teacher yelled ok do you have a3ds yeah he said teacher goes ito his bag and sais say abcs or your 3ds will be destroyed he says ab3defghijlmnopqrs oh he learned well the teacher thrw the 3ds out the window the kid gets it and it still wirks then he googles abcs it goes to youtube and says abcdefghijklmnopqrstuvwxyz teacher is proud of the 3ds the class went home tekll ing pa

I masturbated by accident. I read the wrong thing And tested it's factuality-

Well it's been some good years now Haven't they? Being your own partner has never felt so together.

When I trying to eat, but I hurt my feet. When I using a hoe, but I hurt my toe. When I going to a doctor, but then I get trolled. Oh I just, want to say, what the flip?!!

When I using a copper, but I enveloped by a hopper. When I trying to draw someone, but it ended up with a punishment. When I spit on a bunny, it jumps right on me. Oh I just, want to say, what the flip?!!

When I growing older, someone called me a slacker. When I was 33, I bumped into a tree. When I getting angry, people calls me crazy lady. Oh I just, want to say, what the flip?!!

A boy asked his dad for a some money to buy an ice-cream with. So he went to an icecream van. Whilst he was in the queue 2 boys asked him what flavour he was getting he told them strawberry. The two boys were shocked and beat him up. The icecream man felt bad and gave him his strawberry ice-cream for free. When he got home his dad also asked what flavour he bought the boy said strawberry. His dad then kicked him out of the house. The boy confused walked down the street and was stopped buy the police who were looking for a boy who had been eating strawberry ice-cream. The boy said thats me and the policeman arrested him. A week later in court the boy was on trial. The judge asked, ''can you tell me what were you doing on the fith of may''(the day he was arrested) the boy said I was eatimg ice-cream. Yhe judge decided he was innocent. On the way out the judge asked him what the flavour was (he had forgotten to ask during the trial). Of course he answered with strawberry the judge horrified realised he had given the wrong verdict and the boy should have been executed. Unfortunately he couldn't change what had happened so the boy walked out and crossed the road but was hit by a car and died. The moral of the story is look left and right before crossing the road

one day, a class of children were killed in a bus accident, but only some survived. One was praying that he would survive, and the other said,"First time?"

True story: my math teacher mr.ueberoth accidently marked a kahoot as 100 points in googleclass room instead of 10 if he doesnt find out the grades will be more hyper inflated than zimbobwa’s economy.

My pet parrot had an accident and lost both his wings...he is being very brave about it though...he is totally unflappable

A bully told an orphan to cry to his parents, so he did. His adoptive parents were very supportive about the situation and everything was settled. He died in an accident a day later.

there was a kid at school he was reading a book and he came across a phrase it was purple pation he went to his teacher and asked what it ment his teacher said hat the actual hell get the hell out of my class and go to the princible offic the princible said its ok iwas probably a mistake i will clean this all up in the mean time whats the phrase he says purple pation his prncible stares at him for about 3 seconds then says get the hell out of my school u r expelled he ran 7 miles to his dads offic crying all the way he went to his dad and explained how hs teacher kicked him out of the class and the princable expelled him his dad said calm down i will clean this all up and he said thats what the princable said he said i will clean it up he said ok the phrase is purple pation hisdad said i hate u getout of myoffice i dont want to see u again he ran down crying to his house he explained what happened his mom said the same thing as everyone else so he explaines the phrase his moms kickes him out of the house and he ran down to the park crying a old lady said whats wrong he explained whats happening then she says wellwhats the phrase he says purplepation the old lady said see that house across the street thats my house come over in about 30 min and i will explain he says thank u it was the longest 30 min of his life he sprints across the street and gets hit by a bus sorry guys ;)

1. If being ugly was a crime you would have a life sentence

2. My phone battery lasts longer than your friendships

3. There is a tree out there giving you oxegyn, and you owe that tree an apology.

4. I don’t hate you, but I gotta unplug your life support to charge my phone.

5. When I saw your dad on the side walk I didn’t laugh but the sidewalk cracked up.

6. If I had powers I would make you the dumbest person alive but it seems life already beat me to the punch.

7. If karma ever comes to punch ya in the face, I wanna be there to help it

8. If I had a dollar for every time you said something smart I’d be broke.

9. You are more disappointing than a cake without frosting

10. Were you born on a highway cuz that’s where most accidents happen

11. Wow, that hurts, now I know how it felt when your mom said that to ya

12. Your the reason this country has to put directions on shampoo, and you may as well be the reason why the middle finger was invented

A twin engine has two engines. If one engine stops, the othe will have just enough power to get the plane to the scene of the accident.

dad: My kid just said butch but since he is a kid he said a bad word on accident *the next day* uncle: F*CK