Accident jokes
I saw a helicopter on January 26, 2020. Then Kobe was on the news.
What’s the difference between a Mercedes and a Skoda?
Princess Di wouldn’t be seen dead in the back of a Skoda...
What did the fat guy say when he fell off the ladder? "Catch me!"
"Learn to fly a plane," they said. "It'll be fun," they said...
I was gonna tell you a Kobe Bryant joke.
But it would just crash and burn.
What's Kobe's favorite song?
"Helicopter Helicopter"
People said that Kobe could fly so high, but that did not end well.
Been getting a lot of paper cuts on my fingers lately, I guess it's a sign I should go lower.
Papyrus was playing with the human, but then Papyrus fell and he broke the cell bone of the human.
What’s got 4 wheels, does a barrel roll, and goes from green to red in seconds?
Kermit in a car crash.
A man walks into a bar.
He had to have 13 stitches!
I wasn't close to my dad when he died.
Which was good, he died to a landmine.
Al Fayed’s son arrives at heaven’s gates and sees his driver.
He shouts “you stupid cunt!”
The driver says, “Watch, Boss?”
Dodi replies...:
“I said I WANT TO FUCK DI IN THE TUNNEL NOT FUCKING DIE IN THE TUNNEL!”
"Bill? Bill?" Bill hears faintly in the distance.
Bill Nye snapped back into reality only to find he had peed all over the set.
I hit something when I pulled into my driveway.
And then I noticed that my cat was missing.
What's red all over and spins at 100 mps?
Baby in a blender.
Two men walk into a bar, no clue how they didn't see it.
Michael Jackson was the King of Pop until he got burned by Pepsi. Now, Pepsi is the hero, and now, we know the rest of the story.
My friend fell on the Nile river and Egypt last week.
He swears by it, but he’s in denial.
Did you know Paul Walker was a method actor? He took his role very seriously as a human torch.