Ability jokes
Why can't Helen Keller drive?
'Cause she's a woman.
No, really. Why can't she drive?
Because she died.
A kid got a bike and a soccer ball for Christmas. He was still unhappy.
Why?
The kid had no legs.
What can a gay man with a physical disability do better than a heterosexual woman that doesn't have a physical disability?
Suck a big cock.
Chuck Norris once ran all the way around the equator and kicked himself in the back.
Why do physically challenged gay men suck dick better than females who are able-bodied and heterosexual?
Because physically challenged gay men do it best! 👏 🙌 👍👍 👌 👌 💪 💪 🥰 😊 😃 😄 😁 😍 💖 ❤️ 💖 ❣️ 💕 💘
Once I saw a mirror... and that was when I got the ability to become a ghost.
Why is Beast Boy so good at flying?
Terra hasn't forgiven him.
Alya is so retarded.
Chuck Norris doesn't zoom out; everything moves backwards.
Why did Sally fall off the swing?
Because she had no arms.
Knock, knock!
Who's there?
Not Sally.
What can fly?
Bird.
I'm so good at sleeping, I can do it with my eyes closed.
You say to your slow friend: "Damn, you're slower than Stephen Hawking!" And that takes some talent.
I'm psychicking your butt.
Why couldn't Professor Xavier fight Magneto? Because he couldn't stand up for himself.
What is the difference between an orphan and a deaf kid?
They can't hear or speak to their parents that never came back.
What do you call an autistic kid with a gun?
Special forces.
What gives you the power to walk through a wall?
A door.
What do you call a woman who says she can do anything a man can do?
Wrong.
A man enters a bar with some friends, and they all sit down to a drink. After not too long, a man with glasses comes through the front door saying, "Anyone who wants to fly off the third story balcony, come upstairs with me!" When no one listens, he shrugs, and everyone watches him go up the stairs. Ten seconds later, he comes back in through the door, again saying, "Anyone who wants to fly off the third story balcony, come upstairs with me!" Everyone is amazed, and a few people leave to go fly with him. He keeps coming back into the bar, bringing more and more patrons to join him. The man at the bar is about to join in when the bartender finally sighs.
"For the last time, Superman, get out of my bar, you're drunk and the only person here that can fly!"
The man with glasses frowns.
"Where did all the others go, then?"