Worst Jokes Ever

Worst Jokes Ever

I hate double standards. Burn a body at a crematorium and you’re being a respectful friend.

But do it at home and you’re destroying evidence.

Man to woman: "Would you sleep with me for one million dollars?"

Woman: "Sure."

Man: "How about for ten dollars?"

Woman: "What do you think I am?"

Man: "We’ve already established what you are. All we’re doing is negotiating price."

What's the difference Michael Jackson and a play station have in common...

They're both plastic and kids turn them on.

What is the difference between your girlfriend and your sister?

They're both "sweet home Alabama."

When you're a terrorist and you have a stutter.

A a a a a a a a ala ala ala ala ala alaog alaogbar.

I have a big bag of Doritos in the kitchen. It's only for people who are skinny, but the fat people can't have any. All they do is suck it up like a lollipop.

Bubba couldn't make rent, so he offered to sleep with the landlady instead.

I think he forgot he lived in his mom's basement.

If the teacher tells you to stand up if you're not gay and there's that one kid in the wheelchair.

I'm just here to say that I don't approve of political jokes.

I've seen too many of them get elected.

What do you call a man who likes rape jokes?

A fucking disgusting scumbag with no intelligence whatsoever. If you actually joke about this, you are the reason humanity has faded.

I'm in jail for 5 minutes and I already got fucked 15 times. You don't have any idea how much I hate playing Monopoly with my dad.