Worst Jokes Ever

What’s the difference between a suicide bomber and a feminist? A suicide bomber actually does something when triggered.

I have no problem getting dates online. I’ve also had luck with almonds, cashews, and walnuts.

Why shouldn't you let a Chinese person play baseball?

'Cause they'll eat the bat!

Why don’t midgets fight? They walk away to be the bigger man.

Yo mama so fat, that’s why people don’t want to marry her, except for fat guys.

For our anniversary, I gave my girlfriend a picture of me inside a pistachio.

But that’s just me in a nutshell.

Are you a school? Because I want to shoot a bunch of kids in you.

What do lesbians and turtles have in common? They both choke on plastic.

I got detention yesterday because I told the emo kid to "Hang in there."

What's the difference between family and cats...

Cats won't abuse you at Christmas.

My granddad killed Hitler.

Rape jokes are the funniest thing to ever exist.

Can two high-femme lesbians go on a date with each other?

Yes, but it will take them forever to get ready.

You have more chin than brain cells!

I like my wine how I like my women: 7 years old, and locked up in my basement.

"Among Us" is a game (Skeld) where there is an imposter trying to hijack the ship and kill everyone. Does this sound similar to September 11, 2001?

I went to a park, then I kicked a ball at a kid in a wheelchair, then screamed "Rocket League!"

What's a Mexican's favorite sport?

Cross country.

Every male is expected to pass their driver's test. Paul Walker clearly failed his.

A man went to the library and asked for a book about suicide. The librarian said, "Go away, you won’t bring it back."