What do 9 out of 10 people enjoy?
Gang rape.
What do 9 out of 10 people enjoy?
Gang rape.
When Stephen Hawking was feeling hungry, he used to call in to his local PC World for a megabyte and some microchips.
Yo mama is so poor, she asked a homeless guy for money.
My teacher gave us an assignment, and one of the questions was "What do you want to be when you grow up?"
I answered, "Happy."
The teacher said I didn't understand the test. I said to her that she didn't understand life.
Stephen was a great person, and he will be greatly missed, but I enjoy these jokes too much to not stop.
Stephen Hawking isn't really dead, he's just rebooting.
Last night in bed, I was gazing up at the stars and was thinking to myself, "Where the f*ck is my roof?"
In a cruel twist of irony, Stephen Hawking's favorite song was "I've Got the Power."
A pedophile lures a group of Houston Girl Scouts with "Hey girls, would you like some candy?" They all agree and follow him to his neighborhood. There he offers them some more candy and they follow him to his house. Once again he offers them candy to go in to his house. In the lounge he offers them candy to go to his room. As he leads them up the stairs one of them pipes up and says "God, I hope we get laid before we get diabetes."
Don't worry, Stephen Hawking isn't dead.
They have just got to copy and paste his memory onto a USB.
Stephen Hawking was one of the best scientists ever. Now he's walking up the steps of he... No, he's not walking up the steps of heaven.
He's not really dead, his update failed.
Be warned, if you are in the shower, I might pikachu and it's not my fault if I see any jigglypuffs.
What noise does Stephen Hawking make when he dies? Windows shutting down theme tune.