Worst Jokes Ever
What is a cow that does magic?
A smart cow.
Why do lions 🦁 go to SUBWAY 🥪?
Because they like to EAT FLESH.
"Sanderson, fire a warning shot."
"Uhh sir, this is an M32 rotary grenade launcher."
"Ah potato-potato, just pull the trigger."
What do bees brush their hair with?
A honeycomb.
What is the difference between a human and a tree? A human can walk, and a tree 🌳 cannot walk.
About a dog.
So the horse walks into a bar and the bartender says, "Why the long face?"
UwU
What’s 12 inch long, purple, and makes women scream??
Cot death!
What did the French Fry 🍟 say to the Hamburger 🍔?
I guess that’s a wrap!
Why didn't the bear leave home?
He could not bear leaving his family.
The teacher asked her student to say the alphabet. The student recited the alphabet: "abcdefghijklmnoqrstuvwxyz". "Where's the p?" He looked down to the floor and said: "it's running down my legs".
Why can’t the employee tell dirty laundry jokes?
Because they always come out clean.
What did the fish get on his math test?
A sea plus.
Friend: I'm gonna go ask out my crush.
Me: *fake sneezes* Sorry, I'm allergic to bullshit.
10 Fun Facts.
1. You can't wash your eyes with soap. 2. You can't count your hair. 3. You can't breathe through your nose with your tongue out. 4. You just tried number 3. 5. When you did number 3, you realized it's possible, only you look like a dog. 6. You're smiling right now because you were fooled. 7. You skipped number 5. 8. You just checked to see if there is a number 5. 9. Share this with your friends to have some fun too :-)
What does my head and hell have in common?
They both have demons in them.
Why couldn't the astronaut put the helmet on his head?
Because he didn't have enough space.
Why did the police go to a baseball game?
Because a player stole the base.
Why did the frog cross the road?
To show his gang that he had guts.
What's white, black, and red all over?
A zebra who walked into a hunting reserve.