Worst Jokes Ever
It’s Christmas. Merry Christmin. Merry Chrirismas. Merry Chrisis. Merry Chrsyler.
I'm hard right now.
'Cause you're a DICKstraction. ;)
Badass Toilet Paper Company: We don't take shit off of anyone.
What did Ron put in his diary?
I "Her-mio-ne" after I banged her last night.
Why did the dog walk out at night?
To scare his people!
Why do men say funny things? Just to be silly!
What can you build with people? A boat!
What can read 105 stories in ten seconds?
New Yorkers.
Why are eagles 🦅 bald?
Because they don’t wear wigs.
My life.
Tell me when you get it.
Glip gloop glap.
I was asking people who knew Trump if he would win a second term. Stormy said, "No way, he doesn't have two in him!"
Why are cows 🐮 so big? To scare babies 👶.
What name is easy to say in Spanish?
Marissa!
Q. What do you call a goose that thinks he's a goat?
A. A Billy Goose.
What do you call a cow with no toes?
Lac-toes intolerant.
Why was the astronaut washing her hands?
She was getting ready to eat launch.
What does the policeman say to the jumper?
"Hey! Pullover!"
How about that airplane food? I eat it when I'm high.
Two people just met. One said, “We should do some bonding.” The other nodded and said back, “Titanic.” The first just looked confused so the second one just said, “Sorry, thought that would be a good icebreaker.”