Worst Jokes Ever
Q: What do you call a magic owl?
A: HOOdini
What did the butt say to the other butt? "I got big fat apples for butt checks!"
What's the name of a cannibal's favorite all-you-can-eat buffet? Planned Parenthood!
The first time I EVER HAD SEX I WAS ALL ALONE. You know why?
IT WAS DARK and I WAS ALL ALONE!
What does an Asian call a penis? A wong.
What does an Asian do with its legs? It wok.
Cut.
What’s the easiest way to make a glow worm happy? Cut off its tail—it’ll be delighted!
Do you have a halo, cause I can give you one.
Roses are red, That's a tin can, You have no home, So get in the van!
Who are the fastest readers in the world? New Yorkers. They went through 110 stories in under 10 seconds.
What did the sign on an out-of-business brothel say?
"Beat it. We're closed."
Why do orphans eat cereal with water? Because their dad never came back with the milk.
What part of a vegetable is the hardest to eat?
The wheelchair.
What’s the difference between a drug dealer and a hooker?
A hooker can wash her crack and sell it again.
Did you hear about the dyslexic man who walked into a bra?
What's the difference between your dad and cancer?
Cancer came back...
Why did the chicken cross the road?
'Cause he was on crack.
I wish my dog was depressed so she can cut her own nails.
I went to the table to eat my egg, but I couldn't find it anywhere.
I think someone must've poached it.
What's red all over and spins at 100 mps?
Baby in a blender.