Worst Jokes Ever
Fila is a cool brand. I fill a cock in your man's pussy.
A guy walks into a bar and tells the bartender, "Give me 2 beers." The bartender gives him two beers and coughs in the guy's beer bottles before giving it to him. The guy says to the bartender, "Hey, what are you doing? I didn't order Bud Lights, I want Corona beer." The bartender replies, "Sir, I gave you a mix of Bud Light and Corona, and it's on the house, everyone is drinking Corona tonight."
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Why did the person take crayons to the bedroom?
To draw the curtains.
When I was acting up, my mother used to tell me, "I brought you into this world, and I will take you out. I gave you life, and I can also take it." So my son was acting up and talking back to me. Now I'm being charged with murder. I don't understand. I thought it was okay to kill your own kids.
A hitman walks into a bar and tells the bartender, "I'm here to assassinate John Tucker." The bartender replies, "He’s in the restroom." The hitman goes inside the restroom and comes out after 1 hour.
The bartender asks him, "Did you kill him?" The hitman replies with a sad face, “I asked him any last wishes and the guy asked me to allow him to finish his shit as he is half way in passing his stools, so I gave him my word that I would wait and so I waited for an hour, and when I asked him what’s taking him so long, he says he will not be able to finish because he is just getting started.”
One day my girlfriend and I were just hanging out and she needed to tell our dad that we were going out.
I entered 10 puns into a pun contest, hoping one would win, but no pun in ten did.
Pee.
My wife left me and took the kids.
I like pie.
I think my penis has facial recognition.
Trump goes to a bar and sees Hillary Clinton. He goes up to her and says, "Buy me a drink." She replies angrily, "Get your own drinks. What kind of a man asks a woman to buy him a drink?" Trump responds, "The kind that will grab you by the p***y."
Why was the orphan walking through the neighborhood? I don't know, either. It's not like he has a home to go to.
Why can’t orphans ride bikes?
Because they don’t have parent supervision.
Dating a girl and studying mathematics, both give a headache.
What does BLM stand for?
Bisexual Lives Matter.
What did the letter A say to the letter B?
"Z" you later.
Why can't orphans play baseball?
Because they can't go home.
Why do orphans never play baseball?
'Cause they can never find home.