Worst Jokes Ever
You are gay.
Aarif
Why did Sally drop her ice cream? Because she has no arms.
Where do cows get their medicine?
At the farmacy.
I went up to a priest and asked if he participated in NNN. He replied, "How can I, with all these people calling me daddy?"
Why did the doctor check out Earth?
He had a tummy quake.
I did have a good night's sleep and a good day today, and tomorrow I have [planned] for a good night's sleep, and sleep with my...
What time is it when you get home and you can't walk home?
What do you call a bus going backwards? A sub.
What is the difference between a human and a human?
How do you know when German people break into your house? When you can not find your bed.
I love you too.
I am glass! People see right through me.
What did the duck eat for lunch?
Soup and quackers.
I'm a clown.
A boy and girl are fucking. The girl yells "Senpai!" The boy smiles, pleased, but then her father walks in and says "What?"
A man who desperately wanted to be good after serving time in prison was visited by an Angel. "You want to change? You can still enter heaven on two conditions. You must bet on the horses with any money you have and pass your winnings to someone less fortunate, and you must never hold on to any beef." The Angel then disappeared.
The man did as was told and became generous and kind. As he emerged from the betting office with all his money, he would pass every penny of it all to a deserving person each and every time.
He, however, couldn't seem to avoid meat and would still eat it no matter what.
When he died, the Angel came back for him.
"But I'm undeserving; I can't come with you," he said.
"Yes, you can," replied the Angel, "you gave all your stake (steak) away."
What is the octopus's favorite shape?
An octagon.
What time is it when you get home, and you can walk, walk home and walk, walk home from?
What time is it when you get home and you can walk, walk? Eeeeeew!