You must have a good power supply, because you're easy to turn on!
Worst Jokes Ever
Harry Potter
Dobby: "Dobby never meant to kill, Dobby only meant to maim or seriously injure!"
Jumanji
Coach Webb: "Ok, there's a lot wrong with that."
Have you ever noticed when a woman is pregnant all her friends touch her stomach and say “congrats,” but none of them touch the man’s penis and say “well done?”
Repost
Hey ummm help!
When your parents say, "We are sorry that you are here," what do you think of that?
I think that you're an accident!
Why is the beach friendly?
Because it waves!
I thought today was going to be a good day when I woke up this morning. But then I got to the store and they said they were out of rope.
I was playing baseball with orphans, but when they hit a homerun, they had nowhere to go.
I was watching the local chief police in America, he said, "We will never forget 911." I thought, "I should hope not, it's your phone number."
What did the rope say to me?
"Hey there man, you wanna hang later?"
"Number 15: Burger King foot lettuce. The last thing you want in your Burger King burger is someone's foot fungus, but as it turns out, that might be what you get."
What do doctors say to patients who blow wind backwards?
DON'T PUT THE FART BEFORE THE FORCE!!
Me: I’m gonna smite the life out of you!!!
Orphan: What! No! Please no!
Me: What you gonna do? Run home and tell your parents? Wait, I forgot, you don’t have a home or parents!!!!
Why didn't the orange go to the doctor?
Because he had vitamin C.
What do you call a clown that is allergic to strawberries?
...Ollie the clown!
Why did the clown not attack Mike? Because they bouncee.
Bro, your toenails are bigger than your IQ.
Why can't orphans work at S.C. Johnson?
Because it's a family company...
What does the Titanic sell most?
Icebreakers.
Why is the USA so bad at chess?
Because they already lost two towers.