Worst Jokes Ever

Why did the ACLU block the cellphone number of a Christian nationalist minister? Because the Christian nationalist had a virus on his cellphone and kept calling the ACLU because he wanted to join the ACLU because he wanted to become a card-carrying member of the ACLU.

Crappy joke warning: How does Spongebob have fun? He smokes seaweed.

Me: *watching TV*

Mom: Omg, no way, your dad is coming!

Me: Really?

Mom: Obviously not, he never loved or wanted you.

What is the difference between anal and oral sex?

Oral sex makes your whole day. Anal sex makes your hole weak.

I played catch with my friends, but they keep going to sleep when I throw it.

What do you call a group of depressed teenagers?

Suicide Squad.

So I guess Ice Cube was right, Eazy's dick smelling like MC Ren's shit, and Eazy died of AIDS.

What do you call an octopus on land?

A spider, duh!

My grandpa's last words before he died in Vietnam were, "What the fuck did I step on?"

When someone calls you, say "Welcome to Joe's Pizza Abortion Clinic, your loss is our sauce."

When you commit suicide in your house, that's suicide, but when you commit suicide outside, you failed your parkour.

Best way to kiss someone is to lick inside their mouth with your tongue a lot of times, and they will really like it, especially me!! - lizard kiss+ french kiss= SloBbY Kiss.

Thanks for learning and getting advice.

Also, don't be such a horny one!

I was crying while my dad was cutting onions in the kitchen. Onions was such a good dog.

Yo mama so fat, she is 4 feet tall laying down.

What do you call a plate that lies? Dish-onest!

🤔 What do gay men who are physically handicapped ♿ can do better than a man who is heteroflexible when 🤔 he has another man's 😍 😋 😜 😏 😳 😉 cock inside 😋 of his warm mouth 👄 👄 give a 👍 👍 good blowjob?

What kind of file turns a 15mm hole into a 40mm hole?

A pedophile.

Why is the last part of orphanage "age?"

Because it doesn't matter your age.

Yes (DYM 66).

Imagine not having a dad.