What does the hare say to the other hare? You look nice with your hare cut!
Worst Jokes Ever
My wife accused me of being a cross-dresser, so I packed up her clothes and left.
The F in "I'm orphan" stands for family.
But there is no F.
What's similar between a pregnant 14 year old and the fetus inside of her? They are both thinking, "Oh shit, my mom's gonna kill me."
I wasn’t close to my dad when he died. It’s a good thing he stepped on a land mine.
Why was 10 afraid?
Because he was in the middle of 9/11.
What’s the difference between an apple and an orphan?
The apple gets picked.
EHO?
Why can’t you kidnap an orphan?
Because you can’t steal what was never wanted in the first place.
RTG iceberg?
Children are like a box of Christmas decorations. I keep them in my basement until it’s time to hang them from a tree.
Women are like marshmallows because they are white, squashy, and we put our sticks inside you.
In Africa, a koala and a kangaroo were very thirsty. The kangaroo said that when they have no water, they dig a hole and water comes out of it. Then the kangaroo dug, and in one minute the koala asked if there was any water. The kangaroo said no, and the koala had to wait for many minutes. Soon water came out of the hole, and then the koala jumped into the hole and drank water. The kangaroo wanted water too, so he tried to pull out the koala, but instead, his tail got chopped off, and then they never became friends again.
Since Christopher Reeves can't play Superman, they got a new person: Christopher Walken.
*New teacher walks in* New Teacher: Hi there, class. My name is Mr. Willy. I will be your math teacher.
*Me in shock, "Willy"* Me: Willy Wonka, is that you?
What do people with cancer always want to watch?
"Finding Chemo."
You're so hot when your girlfriend tries to suck your cock, it burns her mouth.
Me: Man, I wish my clothes were emo.
Friend: Why?
Me: So they would hang themselves.
Yo mama is so fat that when she was at school, they needed a satellite to take her school photo.
What day are twins born the most?
Toos-day.
