Worst Jokes Ever
Why couldn't the toilet paper cross the road?
'Cause it was stuck in the crack... *buttcrack*
What did the kid say to the orphan?
"Well, at least I have parents!"
I was at work yesterday and I saw this kid crying. I went up to him and asked him where his parents were, and he started to cry even more. Gosh, don't you just love working at the orphanage?
Why did little Timmy dip the cookie in water?
"Because his dad never brought the milk."
What kind of nuts come in cans?
Creamed a-corn.
How do you get a squirrel to be your friend?
Act like a nut.
What did one nut say to the other nut when it was chasing it?
“I’m gonna cashew!”
Where do squirrels go for fun?
The acorn-ival.
Why did the nut go to the bank?
To cashew its check.
Why didn’t the pecan go to the ballet?
It was afraid of the nutcracker.
Why did the boy leave his chestnuts in the rain?
He wanted them rusted.
What competition do nuts participate in?
The peanut butter cup.
What do elephants drink on vacation?
Peanut coladas.
Which nut is the best at playing tag?
Catch-yous, aka cashews.
Where do nuts go for a quick energy boost? The nearest Shell station.
Which nut is the worst for your diet?
Donuts.
How did the nut study for its test?
It used the inter-nut.
What’s a nut’s favorite scary movie?
The Creature from the Black Legume.
What did one nut say to the other?
“Cashew later.”
Why did the elephant cross the road?
To get to the peanut.