Worst Jokes Ever
White people be like, "Less bomb Ukraines hospitals and schools!"
Hahaha, dumb white people!
"Proud boys" more like snitch boys!
A dead Russian is Trump's accountant.
I was raped by mimes once. They did unspeakable things to me.
My teacher asked the class to stand up if you're dumb. No one did, so she said, "Come on, someone must be dumb," and pointed over to the left side of the classroom. Lil Jonny stands up. "Do you think you're dumb, Lil Jonny?" asked the teacher. "No, I just feel bad for you. You're the only one who stood up," replied Lil Jonny!
What’s long and black?
The line at the unemployment office.
I got jealous when my phone dies.
What's blue, red, and white and dead all over?
Trump's dead Russian mates.
What do you call a white kid looking at infants?
Pedophilia boy.
Girlfriend: Babe, what do you think of our love?
Me: Look at the stars in the sky.
Girlfriend: Aww... it’s infinity, right?
Me: No, it’s a waste of time.
Girlfriend: I’m breaking up with you.
Me: Whatever, when I take out the trash, I think of you.
What did Cinderella wear to the beach?
Glass flippers.
A man robs a bank and asks a woman, "Did you see that?"
She says, "Yes." So the man shoots her.
He leaves the bank and sees a couple. He asks, "Did you see that?" The husband said, "No, but my wife did!"
Vaginas are like onions. They have lots of layers to get through.
Why can't emos stand in chairs?
Because they never get down.
What did the cupcake tell its frosting?
I’d be muffin without you.
My pits are hairy, but my I can carry.
What can you say about planes that you can say about stocks?
They both be flying??
What can you say about that homeless man's life and current status?
Wasted.
What do you give a sick lemon?
A lemon-aid.
What do you call a fake noodle?
An im-pasta.