Worst Jokes Ever
You were born on a highway in a car crash, I wonder why.
Yo mama so small that she tried to hike Mountain Dew.
The first time I heard your voice, my foreskin fell off.
It's kinda sad seeing you attempt to put your whole vocabulary in one sentence. Oh wait, you only said three words.
A woman exclaims that she was robbed. She was reading in the dark, candles were next to her. She says the thief opens her cabin of jewelry and leaves and enters from the window. He left the window open so she feels a drift of wind coming towards her. She turns the lights on and sees what happened.
The candle wax was going down straight. A policeman closes the window and cabin then tells her she's lying just for the cash reward. Why?
Because if the drift of wind came in, the candle wax would be dripping to the side, not straight!
What store is the most public?
Publix!
What's a cow's strongest part of their body?
Their "calves"!
"What’s your name?"
"Am erica."
"No, I asked for your name, not your country."
Dog: Woof!
Butcher: Say less.
Ligma.
Ligma balls.
Why do orphans love going to church?
So they can call someone "father."
What’s red and white and black all over?
A dead white man at night time!
gay fish.
Dark humor is like water. It exists.
Why is it so easy to weigh fish?
They have their own scales.
Sometimes I am happy, and there are times I envy my dog.
My wife got mad at me because I took our life savings and brought golden retrievers.
Like, bitch, we can get gold because of these golden retrievers.
Why is it easy to weigh a fish?
Because they have their own scales.
How do you know when you are dating a cannibal?
You go to the beach, he offers to put suntan oil on you, and the brand name is Wesson.
You are having sex and he says he wants to eat your a$$ and you notice he is holding a knife and fork.
He invites you to his home to use the hot tub and it is heated by a wood fire.
You are having an argument and you say "bite me" and he starts to sharpen his teeth.
What's the difference between a sex slave and a goat?
I don't have a sex slave in my basement...