Worst Jokes Ever

Worst Jokes Ever

Why can the orphan only go to restaurants?

Because they can't have homemade meals.

What do clams do on their birthday? They shell-brate, but they eat all the cake for themselves because they’re shellfish!

It’s nice hitting it from the back when my wife has wide hips.

Her butt cheeks look like big huge ball sacks as my thighs smack up against them when I’m thrusting. I like to finish off by grinding my weiner up and down her back like a gay man frotting his schlong on his partner’s ding dong.

The teacher asked the class what they wanted to be when they grew up.

Johnny said when he grows up he's going to be a motherfucking hustler. He's going to have a wife and live in a big house in the country with maids and butlers and drive a Rolls-Royce, and he's also going to have an apartment in the city where his side bitch is going to live. He's going to buy her expensive jewelry, whatever she wants: cars, diamonds, clothes, shoes.

The teacher didn't know what to say, so she calls on Sally. "What do you want to be when you grow up?"

Sally said, "I want to be Johnny's bitch."

If you ever become depressed, try drinking a gallon of water before going to sleep... That'll give you a reason to get up in the morning.

What is bigger than an elephant but smaller than two elephants?

A different sized elephant.