Worst Jokes Ever
I'm emo, by the way.
Your momma is so hairy that when you were born, you got rug burn.
One thing you can ask Mario:
"Can you jump up and down for me?"
What did Nemo say to the emo?
"Be careful, you can't Nemo your way out of emo."
I went to the super market one day and I saw a Caesar salad for 69 dollars. Next minute someone comes up to me and says, "Caesar deez nutz!"
What thing can jump the highest?
Emo kids, some of them are still in the air.
What is the worst thing to do at a funeral?
The corpse.
Why did Hitler kill himself? Cause gas prices were too high!
Why can’t orphans play baseball?
Because they can’t find home.
Why can't orphans play baseball?
Because they can't find home, LOL.
You know the Twin Towers employees were supposed to meet a good football team. Instead, they just met the Jets.
Why can’t orphans play baseball?
Because they don’t know where home plate.
What do you call a person with no arms?
Armless.
No, it's harmless.
I’ve got money and suicidal thoughts, and I’m all out of money.
Who is buried in the tomb of Alexander the Grape?
Alexander the raisin.
Your lips are so big, it turns the Grand Canyon sideways.
Yo mama is so old, she is the founder of the pyramid of Egypt.
Q: What does your Mama and a slinky have in common?
A: They aren't much to look at, but you can't help cracking a smile when you see it tumbling down the stairs.
"OK, son," he says. "It's as easy as counting to 5."
1. Pull down your pants. 2. Pull back your foreskin. 3. Pee in the toilet. 4. Put your foreskin back. 5. Pull up your pants.
From then on, every time the boy goes to the toilet, he counts from 1 to 5. One day, the father noticed his son was taking quite some time in the toilet. He went to check on him and overheard his son saying, "2,4,2,4,2,4,2,4."
Memories: I have ligma.
Ligma what?
Ligma balls.