Worst Jokes Ever
I was once friends with a schizophrenic emo. He tried high-fiving a tree, but it only left him hanging.
Q: How do you know if a gang of Chinese people robbed your house?
A: All the rice is gone.
Look, Bono is a great guy, but shopping with him is a pain, because he still hasn't found what he is looking for.
Being a hooker shouldn't be illegal.
It's like having an Airbnb for your dick.
Q. Why did the kid drop his ice cream cone?
A. Because he got hit by a truck.
My grandpa told me I was too dependent on devices. I told him he was a hypocrite and unplugged him from his life support.
How do you cure a ginger?
Chemotherapy.
Someone: PLEASE EAT! I DON'T WANT YOU TO DIE!
Me: *Trying to remember how long it would take me to die of starvation because I've already googled it and given up because it takes too long.*
Me: Na, yeah, I still have 19 days left.
How do you know you've found a priest? When little Timmy is glued to his crotch.
What's white at the front and black at the back? A bus.
What is the day parents stopped fearing for their little boys? June 25, dead pedo day.
A priest, a minister, and a rabbit walk into a blood bank.
The rabbit says, "I think I'm a type-O."
Teacher: "What is the opposite of the following sentence: 'Children in the dark make mistakes'?"
Student: "Mistakes in the dark make children."
Me: why are Americans so good at rubix cubing? Friend: why? Me: they have a history of separating colors.
Maybe the reason there isn't any physical evidence is because it didn't happen.
Yo mama so poor, she used a KFC bucket as a rain hat.
Warner Brothers have made a new Superman movie with Superman being black.
This new Superman's nickname is the "Man of Steel" but it's spelled s-t-e-a-l.
What is the difference between the Titanic and the Twin Towers?
They both went down.
What’s the difference between Diana and Casper the ghost?
Casper can go through walls, Diana can't.
I recently learned that churches won’t let trans men become priests because they don’t consider trans men as men, which is rather confusing to me.
As a Jew, I don’t know very much about Christianity, but from what I’ve heard, don’t priests love little boys?