Worst Jokes Ever
You're so clapped that you make Susan Boyle attractive.
A priest, a rabbi, and a vicar walk into a bar. The barman says, “Is this some kind of joke?”
Why do orphans eat an ice cream cone?? They can't afford a family pack.
The only woman to ever tell you that they loved you was your mom. (If she even loved you in the first place.)
My son asked for a swimming pool so I got him a ant 🐜🐜🐜 pool.
Roses are red, violets are blue, I'll f*ck your mom, and you'll be next.
Yo mama so dumb, she went to the eye doctor to get an iPhone.
Why don't orphans play tag?
Because there's no one to catch.
Someone in my class yelled "Jenga!" while watching a documentary about the Twin Towers.
At weddings my mom always tells me I’m next. So I say the same to her, at funerals.
What Lord of the Rings book is banned from the United States?
The Two Towers.
Why did the snowman melt?? It had a melt down! 😭😭
I saw a bus the other day with some boy scouts at the back. One of them was having fun getting his knot-tying badge.
Technically speaking, "ur mom/ur father" jokes have no effect on orphans.
They told me a mask was enough to get into the supermarket.
They lied, everybody else was also wearing pants.
"What time is it?"
"Daytime."
Q: What do you call a blonde with two brain cells?
A: Pregnant.
I asked my French mate if he had a games console. He said, "Oui!"
I taught my dog how to play the trumpet on the London Underground over the weekend.
He went from Barking to Tooting in just under 20 minutes.
The police officer in London, who used fake Covid rules to arrest a young woman, drive her more than 50 miles out of London in a hire car, murder her, and do whatever to her, has appealed against his Whole Life tariff.
He should be relieved it was only that! Could've been worse... could've married her!