Worst Jokes Ever

Worst Jokes Ever

"Daddy, what are those two things on mum’s chest?" asked Tom. "Those are just... balloons," said dad.

(Later)

"Dad! I think mum’s dying!" said Tom. "Why?" asked dad. "Because uncles are blowing her balloons, and she said, ‘Oh god, I'm cumming!’"

Two natives sit in the bar getting shit-faced.

Almost closing time, "Brother, you gonna snag?"

"Yeah, I'm taking her home."

He walks over, she gathers her things. Walking out together, he takes her to his car outback. They stay messing around then start having sex. He starts to get carried away. He looks down at her. She looks up at him and says, "Slow down, cousin, you're going too fast..."

What do garbage bins and horny women have in common?

They wait to be filled with a big load.

What did the dentist say when he looks into a patient's mouth?

"I C D K"

You know what I see?

DICK

My son came up to me and said, "Mom, where are your parents?"

I stared in confusion. I said, "In a far place."

He asked, "In an orphanage?"

Why do teenage girls travel in odd-numbered groups?

Because they can't even.

Why did Anakin Skywalker cross the road?

To get the milk and to get to the dark side.