Worst Jokes Ever
What do u call a Chinese man with one leg?
Tie-wan-sho.
What's the difference between Harry Potter and Anne Frank?
Harry made it out of the chamber.
What's the difference between sex and rape? Some effective drugs.
My cousin: “How’s the lemonade stand supposed to run when you’re at softball practice?!”
Me: “Lemonade stands can’t run, dufus.”
What’s long, white, and full of cream? A cheese stick.
Stephen Hawking once stood up to bow down to Chuck Norris.
Does money grow on trees? No.
What is money made of? Paper.
What is paper made out of? Trees!
What’s a vacuum cleaner’s favorite plant?
Answer: SUCCulent
Okay, so I have a dairy and sugar allergy, and if I eat it, I get REALLY CONSTIPATED, so this is me when I’m constipated ᕙ(⇀‸↼‵‵)ᕗ lol.
Your hairline went back faster than your adoption papers!
If I die, does my depression die with me?
What is depressing, alone, chronic, and messed up? Me.
If you give someone a plane ticket, they will fly for a day, but if you push them out of a plane, they'll fly for the rest of their life.
I could have sworn while watching anime I saw an American Boeing B-29 Superfortress in the background dropping bombs!
What do you call a Chinese man with one leg?
TY-WON-SHO
(Tie one shoe)
Wanda and Daredevil have so much in common.
They both wear red, they're both in Marvel, and they both lost their Vision!
Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was depressed.
What’s the difference between a mosquito and a blonde?
One stops sucking when you slap it.
Me: Yo mama so fat her alphabet starts with O.
My friend: What's that supposed to mean?
Me: O B C D.
Roses are red, Violets are blue, You look like Shrek, And you make me peck.