Worst Jokes Ever
I got kicked out of a library because I put a book about women's rights into the fantasy section.
What’s the difference between an orphan and an apple?
One gets picked.
Why did Jesus create the Devil?
He didn't recognize himself through the time portal.
It took me 9.11 seconds to realize.
What's the difference between an apple and an orphan?
One gets picked.
Why does Satan worship himself?
Jesus told him to worship God.
A 14 year old girl finds out she is pregnant. Her: "Crap! My mom is going to kill me!"
The fetus: "lol same here."
The second coming came and went. Jesus believed he was a Christian; therefore, he could never be himself.
What were the Fortnite kid's last words? "I didn't know pumps are back in the game!"
What are the subtitles when a disabled person speaks in a movie?
nsjajahdahwggwdgdvtwqfdvgcqgvhheydgdygsydgdfydwfwdgsqgsgyd
what's the difference between a dog and a dad? The dog comes back.
What's the same about a newborn and a football?
You can kick them both very easily.
"Prostitutes love their jobs; they're always having a blast!"
What do you call a group of depressed people? The Suicide Squad.
A true God would be godless himself.
I don't like making Kobe jokes... they always crash and burn.
God's consciousness: Art.
God's unconsciousness: Christianity.
Why is Jesus in pieces?
Because a one man band is Nine Inch Nails.
I was visiting an orphanage and started to pull in close to the building. My car hit 3 speed bumps, and it caught me off guard. I got out of my car, looked under my tire, and saw three orphans wedged in my tire. I started to get worried, but then I thought to myself... nobody will miss them.
Did the people of England see a "game over" sign in the sky when the queen died?