Doctor: you don't have long to live. 10... Patient: ten what? ten years, ten months? Doctor: 9... 8... 7...
9 out of 10 doctors recommend for children to drink water instead of soda. -- That 1 doctor lives in Flint, Michigan.
Why don't Romans find algebra interesting?
X is always 10.
Arnold Schwarzenegger was asked if he wanted to upgrade to Windows 10. He replied, "I still love Vista, baby".
If you have 13 apples in one hand and 10 oranges in the other, what do you have?
Big hands.
I like my wine like how I like my women, 10 years old and locked in a basement.
My teacher asked everyone how tall their grandparents were, I responded "My grandpa is 5ft 10, and my grandma is -6ft."
How many cancer patients does it take to change a lightbulb? 10, 1 to change the lightbulb 9 to talk about how inspired they are?
In order to get $355 million for his civil fraud case, Donald Trump desperately needed to fundraise. So, in every Republican Party event, he will serve the Patriotic Trump Dog! It consists of an 80-year-old sausage inside a 10-year-old cream bun, topped with Russian dressing.
Trump does have the best people, doesn't he?
There are 10 types of people in this world.
Those that know binary and those that don't.
one day little billy came in pulling up his pants the teacher asks "Where have you been billy" he says on top of beverly hill a few minutes later little willy came in the teacher asked where have you been he says on top of beverly hill 10 minutes later little johnny came in teacher says again where have you been ha says on top of beverly hill a few minutes later a girl came in the teacher says who are you she says i'm beverly hill
Give a man a plane ticket, he’ll fly for a day. Push a man out of a plane flying 10,000 miles up, he’ll fly for the rest of his life.
Kenney lost his virginity to a $10 hooker but he only had to pay $5. She was his sister so her got the family discount.
who read the most words,
911 passengers, they read 12 stories in 9.10 seconds
A guy sits at a bar in a skyscraper restaurant high above the city. He slams a shot of tequila, goes over to the window and jumps out.
The guy sitting next to him can’t believe what he just saw. He’s more surprised when, 10 minutes later, the same guy walks back into the bar and sits down next to him.
The astonished onlooker asks, “How did you do that? I just saw you jump out the window, and we’re hundreds of feet above the ground!”
The jumper responds by slurring, “Well, I don’t get it either. I slam a shot of tequila, and when I jump out the window, the tequila makes me slow down right before I hit the ground. Watch.” He takes a shot, goes to the window and jumps out.
The other guy runs to the window and watches as the guy falls to just above the sidewalk, slows down and lands softly on his feet. A few minutes later, the jumper walks back into the bar.
The other guy has to try it, too, so he orders a shot of tequila. He slams it and jumps out the window. As he reaches the bottom, he doesn’t slow down at all. SPLAT!
The first guy orders another shot of tequila. The bartender shakes his head. “You’re really an a**hole when you’re drunk, Superman.”
They say watching child porn will get me 20 years in Jail. I prefer to think of it as two 10 year olds
What does McDonald's and priest have in common they both put there meet in 10 year old buns
a blond, a red head, and brunette, were stuck on an island, and the closest populated island was 100km away, so in turn they try to swim to the island, the brunette swims 10 km then drowns, the red head swims 30 km then drowns, the blond swims 50 km then gets tired so she swims back.
If i had 10 dyno nuggies and Jamal tried to take one i would have ten dyno nuggies and Jamal's head
What’s 10 inches and makes women scream?
Cot death!
