A missile hit a hospital earlier this morning. Fortunately, no one was injured - but 100 were killed.
Why are planes the fastest readers? Because they went through 100 stories in 20 seconds.
The E and F in Orphan stands for Every one in their Family.
Me: yep they definitely have one 100% đŻ
I hope all of you had a great merry Christmas, a happy Hanukkah, a good whatever you celebrate! I got so much this year, over $300 of fishing gear, a small 2011 coin mint collection, some coins from the Nazi party, a remote control car, 100 dollars, and more. Say what you guys got in the comments.
My sister bet me $100 that it was impossible for me to build a working car out of spaghetti. You should have seen her face as I drove pasta
It cost me $100 to ride a taxi over your belly, it was that big!
My girlfriend left me today for spending my own money. What a bitch! I spend a fair amount of money on her for her clothes and Air Force Ones, but as soon as I spend $100 on hookers, she leaves me.
A man walks into a pharmacy and buys multiple containers of Tylenol, and the clerk asks why he's buying all of these. He replies with, "I'm playing 1 pill eat 100."
What is it called if you give 100 disabled people guns?
Special Forces.
Yesterday my mom forgot to go grocery shopping, and I was starving, so I kept opening the fridge about 100 times, but nothing new was in there.
McNeill's mom wrote a shopping list for supper:
cabbage _50
Carrots-50
Cooking fat -100
Onions_20
Tomato-20
salt-10
Total=250
She gave McNeill the list to get the ingredients.
McNeill took long to return home from the shopping.
His mom decided to call McNeill to ask why are taking long. McNeill answered, "I have all the ingredients, but I'm looking for total."
My girlfriend left me for spending my own money. I buy this bitch thousands upon thousands of dollars worth of stuff, but I spend 100 dollars on a prostitute, she leaves me.
Your hairline is so close to Earth, it's 100 million lightyears away!
I hate likebeggars. They are just writing some stupid "like if" shit just to get attention. I mean, that's so lazy, so unoriginal, and stupid.
Anyways, can this get 100 likes, please?
What's worse than 100 dead babies in a skip?
The one that's still alive in the middle trying to eat its way out.
So a lady was walking down the street with two bags, and one of the bags was leaking $100 bills. A cop pulls up and he says, âMaâam, maâam, your bag is leaking hundred dollar bills.â Then she says, âOh, thank you. I wonder how long thatâs been going on.â And the cop says, âBefore I help you, may I ask why your bag is leaking $100 bills?â And the lady says, âOK, Iâll tell you. So I live next to a stadium, and I have this beautiful rose garden, but these dumb teenagers always try and pee on the rosebushes. So they stick their junk through the fence, and I grab their junk. I said, â$100 dollars or itâs coming off.ââ The cop says, âOh, OK, well whatâs the other bag for?â And she says, âWell, not all of them want to give me $100.â
Why are 9/11 victims so good at reading?
Because they can go through 100 stories in 5 minutes.
Whatâs Whitney Houstonâs favourite type of coordination? HAAAAND EEEEEEEEEYYYYEEE!
Whatâs better than Ted Danson? Ted singing and Danson!
What did the the drummer call his twin daughters? Anna one, Anna two!
I bought some shoes from a drug dealer. I donât know what he laced them with, but I was tripping all day!
What does a nosey pepper do? It gets jalapeño business!
Read more: 100 of the funniest ever jokes and best one-liners
What does a baby computer call his father? Data!
What do you call a bear without any teeth? A gummy bear!
Why did the golfer change his pants? Because he got a hole in one!
Does anyone need an ark? I Noah guy!
How do you make holy water? You boil the hell out of it.
I bought a ceiling fan the other day. Complete waste of money. He just stands there applauding and saying âOoh, I love how smooth it is.â
Why are 9/11 victims the fastest readers?
They can go through 100 floors in 7 seconds.
True story: my math teacher Mr. Ueberoth accidentally marked a Kahoot as 100 points in Google Classroom instead of 10. If he doesn't find out, the grades will be more hyperinflated than Zimbabwe's economy.
