Zoology jokes
What do you call an animal with 3 eyes, 2 mouths, 6 noses, and 4 ears?
What do you call an octopus on land?
A spider, duh!
How many times do you tickle a squid before it laughs?
TEN-TICKLES
What do you call a bird with no feet? A fly.
What's the difference between an alligator and a crocodile?
One of them you'll see in a while, and the other one you'll see later.
What’s the difference between a cat and a frog?
A cat has nine lives, and a frog croaks every day.
What do you call a group of kangaroos? Gangaroos.
The joke about the giraffe’s neck is far too long to tell.
Kid: Why aren’t koalas considered bears?
Nerd: Because they're marsupials.
Kid: No, because they didn’t have the koala-fication!
Why do penguins carry fish in their beaks?
Because they don’t have pockets. I’m
Knock knock? Who's there? Kanga. Kanga who? Not kangawho, kangaroo!
Why is sex with pandas so much fun?
I don't know, it just is. 🐼
What's a kind of cat that lives in the water? Octopus.
How do you see the difference between a cow and a bull? It’s either one or the udder.
Why don’t alligators grow up to 15 feet? They only have 4.
What do you get when you cross a cow with a cat?
A: Cowacat
B: Mooore
C: Cowacatfood
A pair of cows were talking in the field. One says, “Have you heard about the mad cow disease that’s going around?”
“Yeah,” the other cow says. “Makes me glad I’m a penguin.”
Why are cheetahs the best animals?
The cheetah is the fastest land animal in the world. They can reach a top speed of around 113 km per hour.
A cheetah can accelerate from 0 to 113 km in just a few seconds.
Cheetahs are extremely fast; however, they tire quickly and can only keep up their top speed for a few minutes before they are too tired to continue.
Cheetahs are smaller than other members of the big cat family, weighing only 45 – 60 kilograms.
One way to always recognize a cheetah is by the long, black lines which run from the inside of each eye to the mouth. These are usually called “tear lines,” and scientists believe they help protect the cheetah’s eyes from the harsh sun and help them to see long distances.
Cheetahs are the only big cat that cannot roar. They can purr though and usually purr most loudly when they are grooming or sitting near other cheetahs.
While lions and leopards usually do their hunting at night, cheetahs hunt for food during the day.
A cheetah has amazing eyesight during the day and can spot prey from 5 km away.
Cheetahs cannot climb trees and have poor night vision.
With their light body weight and blunt claws, cheetahs are not well designed to protect themselves or their prey. When a larger or more aggressive animal approaches a cheetah in the wild, it will give up its catch to avoid a fight.
Cheetahs only need to drink once every three to four days.
Holy cow!
A pair of cows were talking in the field. One says, “Have you heard about the mad cow disease that’s going around?”
“Yeah,” the other cow says. “Makes me glad I’m a penguin.”
Why does no one sit next to a cheetah during school? Because they're a big cheetah.