Yours jokes
Hi Gwen, how is life!
A. Bad, lame, and suckish.
B. Good, awesome, and you are loved!
C. Perfect!
I'm guessing that your life is NOT B nor C! Man, you're such an asshole!
Boy: "Mister, can I get candy?"
Mister: No, you shit head.
Boy: Why? :(
Mister: Because I'm not your dad.
Brother: Your nuts!
Sister: What do you mean? You're the one that has the nuts!
Guys, can we stop this stupid drama? I just wanna post my "Doin' Your Mom" lyrics and funny jokes! Please stop it!
Peter: *curses*
Sam: Wow, do you kiss your mom with that mouth?
Peter: Jokes on you, I don't have a mom.
Tony: *having a heart attack* AFSJDHFKJJD Peter, we talked about this!!!
I ate all of your mommy's orphans.
If you're ever bored, beat up an orphan, what are they gonna do? Tell their parents?
You're so fat your ass has 2 zip codes.
I bet when your mom first saw you, she said, "Oh my god, this ain't my child. My child would look amazing."
Person: Where's your mom and dad?
Orphan: :(
Hey, I broke up with your girl.
-Me: What? Why?
Wait, what?
-Me: You f**ked her, so it's your baby.
Your butt looks so big, it's bigger than Sam Hill.
A girl looked in the fridge. She got mad that somebody ate the last ice cream cone. She ran into her sister's room and said, "This is why you're fat!" Then fell down the stairs. Good thing she had that belly roll to save her.
What's the difference between your dad and the mailman? Nothing.
What is your true crush?
A soda crush.
If you're ever bored, punch an orphan. What are they gonna do? Tell their parents?
Are you beef?
Because you're Carlos-Asada.
When it is quiet when you're having sex and you ask your partner to "Do the roar!"
Two cows are standing in a field. One cow says to the other, "What do you think about that mad cow disease?"
The other replies, "Well I don't have to worry about it. You're talking to a telephone pole."
Two sticks of butter walk into a butter bar. One says to the other, "Aren't you going to introduce me to your friends?" He replies, "Sure, dis my butter from another utter."