Yours jokes
What’s worse than ants in your pants?
Uncles.
Kid #1: You're adopted.
Kid #2: At least they wanted me.
Kid #1: Did your real parents want you?
A blonde accidentally kills a cop and calls the police.
She exclaims, “Hello, is this 911?”
The other person, “Yes, what is your emergency?”
The blonde answered, “I called to inform you that you’re 910 now.”
Your mama is so fat, the photo I took of her last Christmas is still printing.
How do you know your sister’s on her period? Your sister pussy taste funny
Memes
It’s not cheating if you’re all siblings.
New teacher: "I was an orphan when I was young."
Student: "But!"
Teacher: "Is something missing?"
Student: "Your parents!"
I told one of my friends, "You're the reason why gene pools have lifeguards."
Banker: I have the right to take your money!
Me: Check my name.
Banker: Robin D. Bank, why?
Banker: *realizes*
Me: 😈🖐️ Gimme, gimme.
Are your forehead and hairline old friends because they go way back?
You're so wonderful that Wonderland booked tickets to meet you!
Your smile is so nice that the moon shines off them.
What's the difference between your mum and the Twin Towers?
I would smash the Twin Towers.
Are you made of gold, titanium, sulfur, titanium, and carbon?
Cuz you’re looking a little big Au Ti S Ti C.
Why can't you make jokes about catholic priests?
Because they blow up in your face.
Every time you feel lucky to have your mother in your life, what should you tell her?
I really hit the mother lode with you!
No one:
Nothing:
Not a single f***ing soul:
Spanish Empire: DING DONG YOUR RELIGION IS WRONG!
I once saw a kid walking down the street crying. So I asked them, "Hey kid, where are your parents?" And he started to cry even more...
"Huh. I wonder why he was so sad..." I said as I walked into the orphanage.
You're so poor that when you walked into an elevator, you thought it was a mobile home.
A poor person came up to me and said, "You're ugly." I said, "You remind me of Spider-Man: No Way Home."