Yours jokes

Ukraine (🇺🇦) vs Russia (🇷🇺), place your bets!

Judge: We shall now sentence you for the murder of your parents.

Accused: Please consider a lenient sentence, your honor.

Judge: But why?

Accused: Because I’m an orphan.

Your forehead built like Darkseid from DC.

What’s the difference between oral sex and anal sex?

Oral sex will make your whole day. Anal sex will make your hole weak.

What is the difference between a priest and a zit?

The zit waits until you're twelve to come on your face.

Roses are red, I sniff marijuana, I have five fingers, The middle one is for your vagina.

Your forehead is so big you could have put an H for Kobe to land on.

Mom: Kid, bring your toys and clothing to the car. We're going to Disney Land.

Kid: Ok.

*Bring kid to the orphanage*.

Me: Why am I an orphan?

Friend: I don't know.

Me: Ask your mom.

Your mouth looks like it came from the commercials.

Your mama is so ugly even Dora can't explore her.

What do you do when you run out of lines on your book?

You look at the emo girl and say, "Hey, can I borrow your arm?"

Dad: Son, you're adopted.

Son: Oh wow, I wonder who my real parents are.

Dad: We are your real parents. Your adopted parents are coming to pick you up.

You: Knock knock. Other person: Who is there? You: Not your parents.

Teacher: Where is your slip so I can see you can come on this trip?

Orphan: Parent signature: ___________

Children are like farts.

You can only tolerate your own.

Are you a volcano? Because you're hot and I really lava you!

Why are a gun and a bag of chips alike?

You pull them out at school and everyone wants to be your friend.

Is your dad Spider-Man, because he got no way home?

Why does everyone get offended at female firefighters?

Like seriously, if your house is on fire and burning, you wouldn't really care if the person saving you had a low IQ, right?